Penis Party Glasses 8-Pack
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FeaturesPenis Glasses are exactly what the doctor ordered for turning your bachelorette party from a fun night into an absolutely wild one! With 8 per pack, there's enough for everybody.
Recently, I’ve been having trouble seeing certain things clearly sometimes, so last week I thought I’d pay a visit to the local optometrist. I explained the situation: I have to squint reeeeeally hard to see my new boyfriend’s penis. The optometrist suggested that maybe my boyfriend just has a small penis, but that can’t be the explanation, because he’s assured me that every girl he’s ever been with told him it’s the biggest one she’s ever seen. So, since that the optometrist decided that maybe I needed help seeing after all, and wrote me a very special prescription: Penis Glasses! Finally, I thought, I’ll be able to see my boyfriend’s penis for the gargantuan monster that it truly is!
Of course, imagine my surprise and dismay when I went to pick up my prescription, only to learn that penis glasses don’t actually help you see penises better - they’re just cardboard novelty glasses with a big cartoon penis sticking out the top! I was devastated. Who cares if I got eight of them for the extremely low co-pay of $5.99. It doesn’t matter how many I wore, none of them helped me see my boyfriend’s massive schlong.
Well, you know what, the universe has a funny way of making sure everything works out for the best in the end. Because as luck would have it, over the weekend I caught my boyfriend cheating on me, and my best friend announced that she’s getting married. So now I don’t need to worry about seeing that prick’s tiny prick, and the Penis Glasses will be a perfect accessory for all of us girls to wear at the upcoming bachelorette party. We’re going to look absolutely hilarious when we hit the town in these things! Looks like my optometrist knew what I really needed all along... maybe I should see if he’s single!
8 pairs of glasses per pack. One size fits all.