Pink Pecker Slippers

Item Description

Sigmund Freud once posited that all women had something called penis envy, which made them secretly wish that they had their own penises. I would posit that he was absolutely correct, but he just got one part of his theory wrong. We don’t want penises in our nether regions. We want penises on our feet.

Hmmmm? You think I’m wrong? Then why, pray tell, do these Pink Penis Slippers exist, hmmm? Surely it can be for no other reason than to fulfill our deepest subconscious psychological desires. What’s that you say? They exist to make everyone roll over laughing at a bachelorette party? Pah, poppycock! Surely, these are nothing but the consecrated realization of a universal psychosexual fantasy, or my name isn’t Science P. Scientist!

Okay, you caught me. My name isn’t Science P. Scientist. And these slippers are waaaay better at making your friends laugh at a bachelorette party than they are at proving the unsubstantiated claims of dead Austrian neurologists. So, I would probably recommend using them for a bachelorette party, and not for your Psychology Master’s thesis. Sorry, Freud.

One size fits all.